Clean Floor Policy, revised.

As you may very well know, our new Clean Floor Policy goes into effect tomorrow. This policy stresses the need to keep our call room clean with absolutely NOTHING on the floor. As we were completing final preparations to implement this new policy, it has come to our attention that there happens to be cubicles and chairs on the floor, which presents a conflict of sorts. However, our client is insistent that we enforce the Clean Floor Policy as soon as possible, so we had to make some amends.

Starting tomorrow, our engineering department will be mounting all the cubicles and chairs on the ceiling along with straps to hold the agents in place as they work while hanging upside down from the ceiling. We realize that it may be a hassle working while upside down, but we hope you will take some comfort knowing that ours is the only call room in the world with desks and chairs on the ceiling.

We also realize that this policy will not be well-received by everyone, but understand that by implementing the revised Clean Floor Policy, it enables our client to continue using our call room services and therefore provide all of us with jobs, even if it means hanging upside down from the ceiling.

Thank you for your anticipated cooperation and hope you’re looking forward to working while uʍop ǝpısdn!