Ice Cube Man, Part 2.

I couldn’t wait until the next morning. In fact the very first thing I did was turn on my computer and head to my local paper’s web site to get the local news. I couldn’t wait to read about how police were baffled by a string of attacks in nearby neighborhoods with no evidence left behind. Car windows shattered and bedroom windows broken by an unknown perpetrator! That I couldn’t wait to see.

I didn’t see such headlines.

Apparently there were other criminalistic events of a greater scale that did make headlines.

Gunman sought by police after fatal neighborhood shooting. Convenience store clerk killed during robbery, gunmen flee. Police officer killed by unknown gunman.

It’s maddening when such criminals go uncaught. Here are their victims, left to suffer the loss of their loved ones while their killers roam free? Don’t they have any remorse?

This was still on my mind as I went down to the kitchen to fill the ice cube trays with water. I wanted to prepare the next batch of ice cubes for my next wave of attacks. Perhaps if I did something more daring, then my exploits would in fact make headlines. As I put the trays in the freezer, once again I thought of these fugitives. These monsters. Surely my actions violate the law, did it? I’m not killing people here, I’m just breaking windows.

Other people’s windows.

Wanton destruction of property.

Isn’t there a law against that?

Hey, it’s my ice cubes that are doing the breaking. I’m only doing the throwing. There’s no law against that, is there?

Once again I drove the streets in the middle of the night. I drove in search of more cars to attack and arrived at a slummy neighborhood. There were scores of cars just lined up along the street as if to invite me to break their windows. So I did. I casually drove up to each car, hurled an ice cube at its windshield and drove on to the next. As I was doing this, I could not believe I was attacking so many cars during a single crime wave.

Crime wave? Please. It’s not me, it’s the ice cubes.

Suddenly a car alarm began blaring and I quickly stepped on the gas to execute a hasty exit. As I drove off, I saw lights of houses turn on and people emerge to investigate what was going on.

I still had ice cubes left over, so I drove past my house to a nicer neighborhood. There I picked the one house that was really going to get it. Leaving my engine running, I strolled a few houses towards my target and began throwing ice cubes without a second thought.

I shattered the windows of the two cars that were in the driveway and broke the front windows of the house before the lights inside turned on.

Instantly I ran for my car and rook an alternate exit to avoid passing the house I just attacked. It’s good to know these streets. I arrived safe at home a few minutes later. I removed my black outfit and crawled into bed to sleep.

To be continued…

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