My Forklift Ordeal, Day 3.

Another scorcher. As usual there isn’t a cloud in the sky to soften the sun’s deadly pummeling. Yes, today marks the third day since I left on the forklift to retrieve a pallet of merchandise from behind the store, but halfway through I ran out of gas and I’ve been stuck out here since, no thanks to the idiot who last drove this thing. He should’ve known the tank was almost empty. Doesn’t he even know how far I have to drive?

Some store I work for. Wait, what’s their slogan again? “Sixteen miles of savings”? Seriously? Why even build a store that huge? And why make the aisles several miles long? I hardly see how this is a new concept in grocery stores. Imagine a store so big that the shopping carts are equipped with GPS devices to help find customers who get lost. That’s when the drones come to the rescue to guide those customers back to familiar territory. I swear, lately there have been dozens of drones flying around the store simultaneously and the racket gets quite deafening. The management has had to turn the muzak up full blast just to drown out the noise. Good thing I work out here.

Great, now we’re back to where I am, stranded on a forklift eight miles from the back of the store where I was headed in the first place. Either I continue waiting for help or I’ll have to walk the rest of the way myself. My only hope now is for payroll to notice that there’s somebody who hasn’t clocked out for three days. And counting.

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