A train wreck of an excursion.

Everyone aboard knew the old train wasn’t going to make it. It was struggling with all its might but it just couldn’t reach the top of the steep incline that was part of a track designed to take us tourists around the mountain. Suddenly the engine quit and even with the brakes on, the train began slowly sliding backwards. Then came a somber announcement.

“Ladies and gentlemen, I’m sorry to inform you that our train has run out of coal. To add insult to injury, the brakes are failing and will not hold us stopped on this steep incline for much longer. It will only be a matter of time before we start rolling backwards at high speed back into town before our train smashes itself to smithereens. Therefore I ask that we all rise and observe a moment of dignity before our unexpected and unfortunate demises.”

We all rose to our feet as a man holding an acoustic guitar walked to the front of the cabin and began singing the Ozzy Osbourne classic “Crazy Train” as we all stood still, trying our best to ignore the trees streaking past the windows outside as the train rolled backwards into town at high speeds before smashing itself to smithereens.

There the train lay, now nothing but a pile of scrap metal with all of us buried underneath. Then pieces began to move as we all dug our way out of the wreckage, laughing and feeling the satisfaction from what had been an adrenaline rush available to those hungry for a thrill few have had the courage to seek.

“How was that?” the guide had to shout above our cheering. He didn’t need an answer, as our enthusiasm gave him the response he was expecting.

“That’s it for the train ride,” the guide announced. “Gather your belongings and don’t forget to stop by the gift shop for your souvenir picture taken just before the crash.”

We all thanked the guide and then raided the gift shop, making sure to purchase the “I Survived A Train Wreck” T-shirt along with our pictures. Meanwhile, the train outside was reassembled and readied for its next terrifying trip down the mountain.

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