Carjacked.

My drive this morning was interrupted when a crazed man suddenly ran up to my vehicle and forced his way inside.

“Take me to Miami,” he demanded, “or I will belch really, really loud.”

After assessing the situation and noticing the man had two arms, I had no choice but to comply. I turned my vehicle around and began to drive south to Miami. After a few minutes, the man became impatient and yelled, “We’re only going 5 miles an hour! Doesn’t this thing go any faster?”

“No,” I replied, “because this is a forklift.”